i love rachel, shes the bestest girl in the whole world

(aj typed this when I wasnt looking)



awwww<3

I've been making more stuff.....
here are my latest creations
Plushy Grenade Launcher with removable grenade AND working plushy swiss army knife with folding blades

   

So, I have to either take a math class or pass this math placement test at school.
I have so far avoided all math classes but I cant go any further without it.  Im at a new school, and to jump into a higher level biology class I have to take this math placement test.  I tried out the sample questions and got all but three.  Ive been staring at these three questions for quite a while now and just cant figure out how to solve them.

I know a bunch of you are math nerds- can any of you help me solve these?  Maybe show or explain the steps?  It would be much appreciated as Im totally stumped.

     

So not having any super great ideas for halloween.. aj is going as Dr. Rockso and Im going as one of the clown girl bimbos from Metalocalypse. 


If anyone wants to do a group costume, here is a list of charachters from the show

is anyone interested in doing a group costume for halloween this year?
Im trying to come up with a good idea..
this is what I have so far, but none of them are really striking me eye as far as originality/ability to make/get en masse before halloween.. group appeal


-star trek
-homemade robots
-rocky horror picture show
-sealab 2021
- yip yips (from sesame street)
-pacman
-micheal jackson thriller zombies ( but if we do this think we have to learn the dance)
-clockwork orange droogs
-zombies from the titanic


yeah i pretty much dont have any good ideas.. you guys?




obviously my ideas arent that great.. my questions are 1)  who's interested in getting in on this?  (we usually get kira to professionally photograph us, I havent asked her yet but I bet she will so we'll have some bitching pics)  2) what group idea should we do?

I had this mace canister that is bright pink and I thought.. if I ever needed to use this- it would be pretty obvious from the bright neon pink that I was about to mace you in the face.  What I really need, is something that doesnt look like mace, or a weapon or anything useful in a fight at all.  I started at my mace canister for several days.. and this is what I came up with:

more plushy art....

A deviant pot leaf guy decides to try the truly evil- smoke one of his own.  He blazes up and finds.. he likes it, even though its so wrong.  He continues his twisted habit in private until he's discovered by his mother. 
 

I just found my new favorite website- MyLifeIsAverage.com 

Its where people post funny little paragraph blurbs about everday life, things overhead.. things that happened to them.  Here are my favorites:

Today, I was in a store pretending to be a mannequin. I saw a little girl running around as her mom tried to leave, yelling, "I haven't said goodbye to everyone!" She proceeded to run down the line of mannequins, hugging them all. When she got to me, I hugged her back. I've never heard anyone scream so hard.

Today I was babysitting my neighbor's little boy. I asked him what sound a cat makes. He said meow. I asked what sound a cow makes. He said moo. Then, to fool him, I asked what sound a walrus makes. He replied with Ku Ku Kachoo. Coolest kid ever.

Today, my neighbor had a birthday party which included a piñata. I know this because I could hear them screaming from next door, "DIE YOU GREEDY UNICORN!" and "MAKE HIM BLEED CANDY!" my neighbor turned 72 today.

and my favorite:

Today, I was at the grocery store in the bakery section when I heard a little girl hyperactively telling her mother what kind of cake she wanted for her birthday. After going through the catalog, she suddenly and loudly demanded a Hannah Montana cake, to which her mother replied, "But you don't even like Hannah Montana!" The little girl nonchalantly responded, "I know, I just want to eat her face." Our youth is doing just fine.

you too, can own your very own uterus plushie.    reproductive organs that are fun for the whole family!

     



Pepper occasionally get the urge to  brush her teeth.  We keep her toothbrush in the toy bin so she can grab it whenever she wants to brush. I got her a smaller kids toothbrush but she only likes the big ones.

i got a card in my mail that says I need to go down to the post office and sign for some registered mail.

has anyone ever gotten anything good in registered mail?

EDIT:  I picked it up.  It was human hair from China.  Really.

i've decided to start a micro- micro blog.

all bogs will be written on the white board in my kitchen.  to view these blogs, you have to come to my kitchen.  all old blogs will be erased to make room for the blog.  Anyone may join Rachel's Kitchen micro-micro blog, but there is only one whiteboard and your blog is subject to erasure to make room for the next blog.

This blog will become the ultra uber elite of all micro-micro blogs.  membership will become so sought after that I will eventually have to stop giving out my address, create elaborate scavanger hunts and create multi-stepped false trails, moving the kitchen periodically. everyone will know someone, who knows someone, who's sisters boyfriend once posted on the blog.  rival micro-micro blogs will pop up as a trend but never gain the notoriety of rachel's white board.  historians will write about the blog.. but there will only be one, blurry and smudged photo of the whiteboard itself for future generations to ponder over.

  
this chick cracks me up.
I love her- Leslie Hall is this crazy fat chick from Iowa who is a rapper/fashion designer/artist and sweater museum curator.
shes crazy.. she wears this fabulous fat girl- david bowie/george clinton/brittney spears costumes she designs and when a fan come on stage wearing a sweater she will "christen" it by giving it a name.



here is some of her art- this one is titled "the fight for des moines and my body"



i just love that a fat ordinary chick from iowa has become this camp- cheese - superstar.   Glad to finally see someone rocking the midwest diva!

my favorite song of hers is "zombie killers" and this is the refrain

shoot them in the brains
if you want to live
shoot them in the brains
even the little kids
if you want to survive them eating your flesh
i suggest you shoot them in the brains

after not really getting more than 2 or 3 hours sleep a day for the last two days, I finally got a nice long 10 hour sleep last night, and I needed it!
 
I had the best zombie dream ever- it was like a movie (I have this kind of dream once in a while) very complete.. everything made sense and there was a storyline that stuck throughout the entire dream.  Here it is-

The dream began with me standing at the end of the street I grew up on.  The place i grew up was essentially one curving street, about a quarter mile long pretty much in the middle of nowhere.  On the one side of the street was thick woods, a small hill and a pond.  The other side of the street is thick woods.. with only one house before the road ends at the only (country) road that connected to the street.  I am standing in a thick fog- I can barely see whats 5 feet of front of my any anything further away is just a dark blur. I am holding a gun, and I am scared.  The zombies have come.  No one knows why or how.. but lots of people are dead or gone.  Myself and two other girls that live on the street with me have taken it upon ourselves to try and flush out the zombies crawling the woods in our neighborhood.  We have taken up a three point watch around this section of woods at the end of the street. I am standing in the street, about 100 yards from the end of the road.  The fog is thick and I am scared.  I keep hearing shots go off near me.. and I occasionally see dark blurs movingi n the fog.  Its my job to stay where I am, shoot any zombies that try and escape in my direction.  The other two girls are flushing the zombies out and shooting them.  I am jumpy.. scared.. these arent the fastest type of zombies, but they're still fast enough to sneak up on you.  The can move at a slow jog.  I am hearing shots go off periodically but no shapes come running towards me.  I see one or two dark blurs run parralel to the woods, then dissapear back into them.  I turn at a noise.. and see another dark blur dissapear back into the fog near the pond behind me.  The fog is thick and opressive. 

Finally the two girls (Megan and Trisha) finish clearing out the zombies from that stretch of woods. Its become pretty clear from the number of zombies that we're not going to be able to defend our homes- they're coming from everywhere- at least 70% of the local population seems to be missing or dead- and no one else on our street is offerering to defend our neighborhood, or even seems to be alive or home anymore.  Zombies are stil everywhere.. the fog seems to be hiding us from them as much as it seem to be hiding them from us, but we need to find safety, the government, help, whatever.  We run to the end of the street to the road where we hope someone will stop and give us a ride.

We stand in the road.. and a car comes by. We wave franically but the driver speeds past us.  He looks terrified, gripping the wheel tightly, we can see the whites of his eyes.  Another car passes, and another.  We wave frantically.  They pass us by. Finally a truck stos, and it is a farm-worker type guy in his twenties.  He lets us in and tells us he's trying to find out where the people are, where everyone who isnt a non zombie is heading.  All the cars are heading in one direction (further into the country) and we gather that there is a farm in the distance that people are heading to, defending from zombies.  A greenhouse, with food growing a a well, and solar power, and a barn with big enough to shelter many people.  I ask him how much gas he has, and he says he has to fill up between here and there at some point, as he is nearly out of gas.  That makes me shiver, thinking of getting out of the car again, in the fog, trying to figure out how to get gas from an abandoned station, not sure if it would even be possible without electricity. 

After driving we see s small farm that has a gas pump out front- the type that some farms have when they have lots of vehicles or live far from gas stations.  There are several cars parked there with people standing around holding guns, filling their tanks.  We stop, realizing that this has become the gas way-station for people fleeing the zombies.  I cant tell if the owners are dead, gone, or just letting anyone use their gas, but there doesnt seem to be anyone stopping us from getting gas, so we pull up and began pumping.  I take my gun (a very nice semi-automatic weapon) and head near the barn.  I look inside, and see row after row of garden hoes. This must be where the farm supplies are kept.  I see a group of 4 people walking past the gas station- they have no weapons and dont seem to be asking for a ride. I beg them to at least each take a hoe to defend themselves- they seem reluctant, almost like theyre in denial about what is happening around them.  They finally each take a hoe and leave, still walking. 

I decide to check the other barn while the truck is still filling, and slowly open the door.  A bat or something flies out and immediatly bites me on the neck.  I swat it away, but I can feel the blood trickle down my neck.  I immediatly become terrified.  No one knows where this zombie infection came from and it could have very well been a bat.  I cover my neck with my hand and get in the truck where the farm boy and Megan and Trisha are waiting for me.  Before the farm boy can start the truck, I feel obligated to show them my bite, in case it does turn me into a zombie I want them to be careful and watch for me turning, intead of being unaware and having me suprise them. 

The farm boy is horrified.  His eyes go round and I can see the whites clearly. My two more practical friends lean in to check the bite- they note that its got a strange bit pattern,more like a lamprey than a bat- a round bite with strange round teeth marks.  Part of me wonders if I should just end it and shoot myself now, but I cant.  We dont know for sure this is what turned people into zombies, it may just be a regular old animal bite.  Before we can even discuss it the farm boy jumps out of the truck (his own truck mind you) and hops in a truck with another guy leaving.  He calls "Im sorry!" as he's leaving and they drive away.  He doesnt want to take the chance, and I understand.

The ever stoic Megan gets in the driver seat and we continue driving.  The whole time I am wondering if I am going to turn in to a zombie.  Will I feel it?  I dont feel different, but maybe it takes me.  We drive for a while, and finally see a farm where people are truck are gathered, clearly defended with guards and people busy at work making fortifications.  We stop here, and are welcomed.  We are given defensive positions, and shown the greenhouse and weapons stock.  i start loading my gun.. I dont know what type it is exactly, but its a wood and metal semi automatic weapon.  It kind of looks like an M1 Garand (my mom has one, so that would explain how I got it)  except the shells have to be loaded one at a time through the breach for some reason. 

I am standing near the weapons cache finding bullets for my gun.  In the dream I am searching for .38's - probably because my mom recently (in real life) gave me a handgun that uses them and finding .38s is incredibly hard these days, almost no one has them.  In the dream they dont of course, look like 9mm, they look like like the standard 30-06 ammo that an M1 Garand actually uses, but I think the point was that I had a hard ammunition to find.  I finally get some and start breech loading them laboriously.  I stash a couple handfuls in my pocket as well.

As I'm loading the gun, I hear the cry from outside.  Zombies sighted!  I start to run outside, but they're already coming through the door!  I turn to the door and start shooting at the zombies that start shambling in the door.  No one else seems to be able to do much, the rest of the people seem to be regular farm workers or wives, frozen with fear.  I start shooting.. somewhat in-expertly, but manage to down some of the zombies near me.  My gun seems to be stuck in single shot mode- and I have to keep breech loading the bullets as there seem to be no clip.  I load them 6 at a time, and shoot the zombies.  They keep coming at me, some even getting so close I could practically touch them.  The zombies have clearly gotten many of the people at the farm unawares, and there is dead people everywhere. 

Just as we start to survey the damage, a group of people attack!  Apparantly they saw this well stocked farm and decided that rather than asking if they could stay, they would rather just attack the people there and take over.  They of course waited until we were weak from defending against zombies to atttack, and rush in.  I start shooting at them,still having to pause and reload in my awkward fashion.  The battle is not going well for our side- our numbers are low and we are disorganized from the zombie attack.  They push us back to the end of the greenhouse and I realize that this is a lost battle. 

My gun is jammed and i cant figure out how to fix it.  i run for cover in the hills above the farm, hoping to be able to buy a little time.  to my immense suprise I find a group of young women hiding up there already.  They had been coming to the farm, like I had, to request aid and a place to stay.  They had gathered from many locations, making their way here with difficulty.  Just as they arrived, they see this gun battle going on, between two group of humans.  They dont know whats going on, but hide in the hills so they can see whats happening.  I explain to them about being attacked, and beg them for help.  They realize quicky that if they want to stay at the farm, this new attacking group doesnt seem very likely to give aid, and they must help me if they want to stay there.  One of the girls helps me unjam my gun, and we plan our attack.

We swarm down from the hills, shooting blindly at any of the attackers.  We cut them down mercilessly until there are only four left, and they surrender.   They look weak and defeated.  I introduce my new group of wonder-girls to whats left of the initial farm residents, and they make weary introductions.  Our numbers all around are decimated- and we realize that we will need everyone left, even the attackers, to run the farm.  We consolidate into one group and go back to the task of preparing for zombie attacks.

(this is when my phone rings and I wake up, gah!)

After writing it down.. if this were a book or a movie.. I think I would change it.  I think at the point in the story where my gun breaks and i run to the hills, I would be unable to fix my gun.  The women in the hills would not have guns either.. and we would swarm the farm and take over.  We would start ripping into the soft heads of everyone there, feasting on brains.  I of course, would not realize that I have turned into a zombie.  I would still think I am a regular person trying to defend myself.  That would be the twist- seeing the end of the movie through the eyes of someone turned into a zombie, realizing that zombies dont know what happened to them- they still think they are regular people, just defending their homes, scared of the "zombies" who are actually just regular people. 

 

new laptop!
a suprise present from the president of my fan club.
life is good!

So lately I've been seeing this "trend" in high fashion to use fur suit heads in their runway shows and ads.  what the hell is up with this seriously?  mmm maybe I should just get a fursuit head! I'll admit I have never put a fursuit on but I am guilty of putting on "just the head" plenty.  Anyone else find this a little bit erotic?  (ok, the carebear one is just fucking creepy though)

     

also i think I found a picture of my ex boyfriend on the internet- he has always done print modeling and every once in a while his pics pop up on the internet.  Here is the pic I found, and a pic I took of him right when he was waking up.  the pic i took he's probably 28 years old.. he's about 34 now, think its him?  Im going to ask him.

  

...but that fire on the news?  that was behind my house.  It got pretty big for a while.. they had to bring in a whole bunch of planes with fire retardant drops, and some helicopters that dropped water. It was actually pretty cool to watch, and they had it out in a couple of hours.

It was apparantly in the Almaden Quicksilver Park, and no homes were damaged. 

sad I'm missing burning man :(

They found three more girls who look exactly like me. This is either the creepiest or hottest thing ever.

computer question for my multitudes of geek friends:

My laptop (or rather ajs) that I have with me in mn has decided that while it can in fact, connect to available networks, have excellent signal strength, and confirm that the network key is correct, it will continually try and acquire the network key with no success. This has happened to me in 2 locations now and its seriously pissing me off! Anyone know what might be wrong?

Second problem... when I attach my camera via usb it doesn't show my camera as a drive or folder on my computer. It usually does, and I can easily dump pics via picasa, but now, nothing.

I'm irritated and my minnesota accent is creeping back don't cha know!

Here is my minnesotan impression:

"Bret farve bret farve..bret farve bret farve- bret farve!"

If you don't get that, good for you. I think its pretty boring myself and am getting pretty sick of hearing about it.